So you have failed once again.
You put your best efforts in changing your life through your attitude and self-love. You knew only YOU could have made a difference in your life.
You owned yourself, your mistakes, and your future. And where it had landed you?
But you were heading in the right direction, weren’t you? And you were motivated enough to take your life to next level. And now? You cannot move on, not with your own uncertainties fighting against you. You need a support and you have none.
You are doubting would you ever be strong enough to control your destiny? Or are you destined to be a slave to your desires and people’s opinions about you?
You know if you had courage to start the journey of self-improvement once, you have courage to complete it and continue it throughout your life. But before going further you need to understand factors which can keep you motivated or which can distract your attention from your goal. Below are some traps which kill your motivation and hidden behind them are ways which can help you protect, and nourish, your motivation.
Deadly trap for motivation # 1
Starting alone has an upside and a downside. Upside is that by starting alone you will move quickly. In the process of loving yourself truly, even the upside of moving alone becomes downside. The more quickly you move, the shallower the effects you will gain from your quest to self-fulfillment.
The downside to starting alone is that you lose motivation earlier than you would have if you had encouraging company. So if you want to keep your moral high during a major personality transition or any area of life, keep injecting motivation from your support circle.
Deadly trap for motivation # 2
So the tip to avoiding trap is to make friends. You may conclude from the above discussion that you should involve your current circle of friends to support you through the process. Here you let your motivation trip in the trap # 2.
Remain with current social circle.
Although maintaining a long-established friendship, or intimacy or family, bond is a sign of character strength, it may not help you in your quest for self improvement.
Your current social circle knows about you, your weaknesses, and your past limitations to overcome these weaknesses. These people are the best resources for you to draw on information about your personality and what may work for you. However, this knowledge can be so strong and the perceptions of these people which stem from this knowledge is so limiting that they’ll keep reflecting themselves in the notes of encouragement and support you will receive from these people.
Do you think the remark “you look a lot younger” will enhance your confidence in your formulated strategy when you know that you haven’t yet established half of your intended routine?
Another devastating drawback of relying on such people is that they keep a number of false beliefs about you. You may have left the phase of life where you blamed others for your issues and they still think that phase is all upon you, till now. What would follow? Their behavior will keep reminding you that part of past and hinder you from moving ahead.
Do I mean that you should avoid your beloved friends and family to re-build yourself? No. All I say is to find newer friends with whom you share your journey of fulfillment.
And cut chords (of emotional sabotage) with those who were previously creating your reality.
Deadly Trap for motivation # 3
Mostly, when we realize room for improvement within ourselves, we find that we need development in more than one area of our personality. The result is obvious. We try to mend all of these aspects with a swish of magic wand. And, surprisingly, we find that we are successful in developing all these traits with little effort.
But does this really happen?
After following a superb perfect routine for a week, or after enjoying a beautiful healthy figure for a few months, or remaining on top best performers at work for a set duration, we fall back to our comfort zone and feel lost.
Does this happen to you too? If yes then you are also a victim of trap number three of motivation which is to start improving every trait immediately.
Taking one step at a time keeps you motivated for a larger period of time. Remember to win race, steadiness follows only slowness.
Deadly trap for motivation # 4
So what should you do? You have many areas to improve and you don’t know which one to improve first. And you make a modest choice which drags your self-improvement regime into another trap, which is:
Start with not-so-apparent trait.
This trap would be an extension of the trap number 2. If we start from a habit which doesn’t make a visible effect soon, then we are sabotaging even little motivation we can get from our existing circle of support. You would start practicing your good habits and these habits would start making a difference in rather-hidden part of your life. But your peers, oblivious of these hidden improvements would keep reviewing your more obvious traits and telling you that your efforts are not worth the difference they are having on you.
So if you want to get constant supply of motivation once you have taken the step to self-love, you need others to accept your commitment to your goal as early as possible. Give your loved ones chance to motivate you realistically by showing them your gains.
What did you gather from the post?
Do you think you are ready to re-start your journey towards self-fulfillment?
Or need to recover from the motivation block you have recently encountered?
Would it be nice to wait and waste next few weeks, months, even years of your life waiting for the right time?
Or do you believe that life is what is happening right now.
If you decide to start moving right now, which is the only right thing towards self-improvement, how would you warm up for the whole exercise?
Share your own strategy in comments.
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Erin shows overscheduled, overwhelmed women how to do less so that they can achieve more. Traditional productivity books—written by men—barely touch the tangle of cultural pressures that women feel when facing down a to-do list. How to Get Sh*t Done will teach you how to zero in on the three areas of your life where you want to excel, and then it will show you how to off-load, outsource, or just stop giving a damn about the rest.